Sunday, February 12, 2012

When Acting Causes Change

Just act! That was today's sermon at church. My favorite quote from our preacher was "If you fail to act, you might miss your miracle." He referenced the widow who fed Elisha, and she was blessed with enough food to survive the famine. I've never been one who hesitates to act upon something. Take me shopping, and I go in to get what I need and get out. When Reece was born, I was in immediate "do something to help him" mode. Maybe I'm somewhat impulsive, I don't know. I just can't stand to hee-haw around about something when there's obviously something that can be done. So, why am I having miniature panic attacks here lately? Well, I'm so convicted that working with preschool children with special needs is my calling, yet I'm terrified of how our family dynamic will change when I start back to work. Reece has done so incredibly well with me here at home, am I going to be messing up a good thing? I can barely keep up with housework, paperwork, etc now. What will this house look like? I know, know, know that God is calling me to do this, and I trust Him in so many areas of my life. I don't know why I have this anxiety. I guess maybe because it will be such a huge change. I'm ready for a change, for sure. If I'm not trying to rearrange furniture, I'm riding through my dream neighborhood (seen here, by the way). I'm changing Reece's room (the big reveal will be soon!), and I'm SLOWLY changing how I exercise. Notice I said slowly! I know I won't ever get in that dream neighborhood nor afford Reece's new school if I don't go back to work, so both the desire and necessity are there. Our preacher also said this morning that some people go through "analysis paralysis" where they analyze every little detail about a big decision that they are clearly called for. I think I might be in this stage! I need to just do it, and trust that God will work out all of those details! He has blessed us with a wonderful family, amazing friends, and an outstanding church. Reece is about to be a part of the launching of a new covenant Christian school, where we feel he will receive all of the love and support he needs. So what, if I'm not there with him every waking moment. In all honesty, it might do us some good to get away from each other! Ha! Fresh perspectives for both of us might just change everything for the positive!
Ok... I've gotten this all of my chest now. I'm going to relax and trust that God has this! Please keep our family in your prayers as we do some "changing" around here!
With love,
Beth

P.S. I've noticed lots of international travel on our blog. If you visit here from another country, please stop and introduce yourself by commenting on a post! I would love to "meet" others interested in Escobar Syndrome from around the globe!

1 comment:

The Long Family said...

I think change is always scary. It is a big change for you to go back to work and everything else that goes with that but you will all adjust. You will be great!